Psychologists Share 12 Rules That Can Help You Find A Common Language With Your Child

5Don’t distract your child from important deals

The biggest mistake parents make is never to give importance to a child’s affairs. This is a common statement in any home “You’re collecting legos? So what, mom needs to speak to you right now” or “You’re on the phone with your friend?? Anyway, stop talking nonsense and come downstairs’ as grandma wants to show you how to bake”

Just because you need to prioritize your actions and needs does not mean you will depreciate your child’s activities. You have to respect their personal space. How would you react in such a position if your partner spoke to you like that? You can always be politer in asking the child if they can postpone what they are doing for later. 

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6You need to be able to backslide

When you are playing chess or board games with a child, don’t forget, you are an adult and as such the rules were already entrenched in your mind a long time ago. A child, on the other hand, finds it fairly new and will adopt a flexible attitude. Forcing the child to follow the rules usually makes us believe that we are disciplining the child for doing the same in adult life but creativity, initiative and flexibility isn’t about following rules, and it’s about working your way around them to achieve a better result.

And of course, it’s just a game with no consequences; allow the child to invent a few of his own rules to make the game more fun and interesting than usual. New things aren’t always better but there is no harm trying. 

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7Don’t force a child to accept your help

This involves patience. When your child is doing something and taking exceptionally long, try to understand he is a child without the resources of experience and intelligence and this is the learning process they go through. Don’t deny them this part of life by imposing your help just because you can’t wait any longer.

As mentioned earlier, the art of patience is greatly needed here and though it irks you to see the same mistake over and over again, do nothing until and unless your child asks for help. If your child makes mistakes, only then he will learn.

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8Ask your kids for advice

Everybody feels that little bit of importance when they are consulted over decisions. Your kids will feel the same way too. This is very effective when it concerns small kids who love to feel grown up and take on some responsibility. You can ask your child direct questions and advice in making decisions. This makes the child feel his voice and opinions matter to you and that you trust them too. 

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